CHAPTER 14

Well, things returned to normal that Monday. By late afternoon, the quiet dormitories we abuzz with chatters of returning students. I slipped out of Nicky's room that afternoon, and by that very night, I was out of Nicky's mind.

He completely avoided me during dinner and shot out of the dining hall as soon as the meal was over. At first I thought he had something urgent to do, but after this went on for a week, I decided that I needed an explanation.

One night, I stopped by his classroom. He was talking to a bunch of boys when I arrived, and quickly came to the door when he saw me. I smiled my sweetest at him.

"What are you doing here?" his whisper was alarmingly harsh.

My smile froze. "I came to see you, to talk to you," I stammered.
"We can't talk here," he said, glancing back at the boys.

He took my arm and hurriedly steered me downstrairs to the deserted students courtyard. I was bewildered, my mind racing. Something is terribly wrong, I thought, but what? Before I could open my mouth to ask, Nicky was already talking.

He calmly informed me that he did not want to see me anymore, that he had his O-level examination to think of, and that under no circumstances that I were to bother him again. Ever. We were finished, he added, and what had transpired between us was only a one-weekend thing. And it certainly wasn't his fault if I thought that it had meant more than that.

I sat down on a bench nearby, my hands over my ears, and started shaking. This is not happening, I kept thinking. He loves me, he said so only last week!

"It was purely physical," he said, as if reading my mind. "I was curious, I wanted to find out."

I was stunned. I wanted to cry but I just couldn't. I don't remember how long I sat there, but by the time I returned to the dormitories, it was way past curfew. I slowly made my way to my room in the dark, careful not to knock into anything.

When I turned on the night light at the foot of my bed, I found Adrian lying in it. He sat up when he saw me, but his cheerful face clouded on seeing mine. I sat down next to him and began sobbing. Adrian put his arms around me and pulled me towards his chest. I cried and cried while he slowly rocked me.

In his bed, Ben stirred and rose. Adrian waved him to silence, and Ben quietly left the room.

After some time, I began to feel better. As my sobs subsided, my mouth sought Adrian's, pushing him back into the bed. I started attacking him, tearing off his T-shirt and pulling at the elastic waistband of his pyjama. "Hey, take it easy. I'm not going anywhere," he whispered, taking my hand to kiss it, before taking off his pyjama and helping me undress.

Our love-making that night was brutal. Like an animal, I devoured his body with a vengeance, concentrating only on my own pleasure, forcing him to find and follow my rhythm. A short while later, with one last beastly groan, it was all over, and I fell asleep with Adrian still beneath me.